The decision to go to The Grounds at peak brunch hour on Saturday is a … choice. It’s not just The Grounds cafe specifically, it’s the whole experience. 

It is trying to find a park in a parking station where almost every spot says you aren’t allowed to park (and some have scary cartoons of a car being towed away). 

It’s waiting patiently at the entrance to give the front of house your booking only to discover you are at the Pottery Barn next door.  

It’s being given directions to the your destination. Turn right, and then left. Go past the goats, and the children’s ball pit. Think you’re lost? You’re not, yet. Have faith, keep going. Just a bit further, yes,  it’s thirty degrees and you’re sweating like a bull-pig, again, just a bit further. See all the instagrammable stuff? Yes, Snow White, don’t look now, it’s not going anywhere and we need to sort the table for brunch. Mazaltov, you made it; now stand in this queue and wait.

Mercifully, the wait isn’t long, improved by the fact that we had made a booking. There is no doubt that The Grounds is a well oiled machine, it has to be or chaos would reign entirely.

Having arrived in advance of my friends, I sit down and order a coffee. A few moments later I receive a call. ‘Help! I’m lost!!’ I take a breath. ‘You need to turn left, and left again. Go past the goats and the children’s ball pit. Now turn left, no, keep going, you’re almost there!..’

The menu is classic brunch and lunch fare with a few twists thrown in. I order the chickpea corn and feta fritters with Hummus, roasted cauliflower, poached eggs, pomegranate ($24). The eggs are perfectly cooked, a bit runny in the centre but not enough to lose the yolk across the plate. The fritters are light and fluffy on the inside but I wish they had a little bit more crunch to them. A squeeze of the lime heightens the flavour. The hummus adds a creamy quality while the parsley and pomegranate offers a freshness and a fruity zing. 

A friend orders the crumbed John Dory and chunky tartare sandwich – Soft bun, cos, pickled cucumbers, parmesan, sweet potato scallops ($26) which is unfortunately a bit greasy, a little bit stodgy, and sub par. They look at my choice with barely concealed envy. 

Dessert is thoughtfully considered, they have created beautiful looking little cakes that fit the theme, but the decision is made that we have reached our threshold. It’s time to brave the heat and Snow White’s village, which is beautifully curated and highly insta-grammable if you have the bandwidth to fight the crowds. 

We buy a crushed lemonade from the cute stall outside to accompany us to the car. With the difficulty it took to arrive, there are no guarantees we will find our way out again.

The Grounds of Alexandria – 7 a/2 Huntley St Alexandria. The website – https://thegrounds.com.au/